a Scarlet D

My therapist thinks I should check myself into the hospital for safety. Complicated. Last time I was in was an anxiety nightmare. Pass.

Was referred for more TMS, got denied today because last time it made my depression worse. Also the VNS is problematic with the magnetics. Refuse to do ECT if they offer it.

I can see the end of PHP coming next week and don’t know what comes next. Not better. Certainly don’t feel well enough to go back to work. Done everything, nothing works.

All I want to do right now is cry at the end of A Star Is Born but the crying doesn’t work anymore.